Dear dairy,
I sit here wondering when is it too late to look back and put the past behind you? When is it too late to stop wondering about what could’ve been and what is?
I got a letter from my first love D the other day… he said he loves me and never stopped loving me and that he never wanted me to marry my husband and that he was still in love with me. He also confessed that the only reason he didn’t say anything when I called him to tell him I was getting married, was because he didn’t know how to react and that he was in shock and didn’t want to get in the way of my happiness. It’s amazing, since I have never stopped loving him and have always thought that he’d be the one am marrying and building a happy home with… we use to talk for hours about how our kids would look like and what features we love best abut each other and how his grandma will need to teach me to make his favourite fish dish.
I guess that it’s too late now as I have gotten married and almost 100% happy in my marriage. Almost 100% because we’ve had some teething problems and he has messed up big time by cheating on me with his ex prior to the marriage, the only problem is, I didn’t find out till after the marriage which was very hurtful and disappointing in its self.
Sometimes I wonder did I make the right choice? Did I choose the wrong person? Was I too fast and should of thought about it more before getting married? Will I ever forgive my husband for what he did to me? Could I ever be happy? IS it too late to look back? Is it time to put the past behind me and start looking forward?
